When it comes to pregnancy and welcoming a new baby into the world one thing that should be talked about more is the role the dads/partners have. I realize many women don't have a father/supportive figure in the picture during their pregnancy and/or for their baby and in this post I will not only share how my husband took on his role as a dad, but also touch on the things I respect about those who have to go about it alone.
So for some dads/partners the moment the pregnancy test is positive they come to terms with it being the beginning of a big responsibility and they immediately take it very seriously. For others, it may take time to warm up to the idea sometimes up until the first ultrasound for it to really settle in and then a percentage of men/partners will be freaked out and either never come around or leave and never even meet their child.
Because it took us over 2 years to conceive my husband was excited from the get go, but as to be expected both of us were a little on the cautious side too. We had a chemical pregnancy 4 months prior so until we saw the little bean it was sort of nerve-racking!
Pregnancy is tough for both men and women so people may react to it and embrace it and support the process in different ways. I give so much credit to the women who do it alone and go through the entire experience by themselves. You girls are so strong and brave and I commend you for it! I am so grateful for the love, support and devotion my husband gave the through my pregnancy, c-section delivery, and now as we raise and coparent our little girl together.
From McDonalds runs at weird hours, running me baths at strange times night or day, lots of trips to the pharmacy for remedies for the relief of several pregnancy related issues, to the embarrassing situations in public such as when I peed my pants or puked or both due to sudden unexpected bouts of pregnancy related sickness, my husband was the biggest supporter and trooper of all! (And somehow he wants to do this all over again maybe even twice more! Yes, he is crazy, but I am so glad!)
My husband was also very brave when I had him take an afternoon worth of maternity pictures in the blazing heat, not to mention when my water broke 3 weeks early and 4 days before our scheduled c-section! He packed the car like a mad man and got me to the hospital in the blink of an eye!
Speaking of the hospital, some men are uncomfortable and unsure of hospitals and child birth is terrifying to them too. My husband was right there for me and our daughter from the very beginning. He jumped right into action and never left our side. Once we got to the hospital and they confirmed my water broke hubby was calling our families to let them know and prepping to welcome our daughter within a few hours. We arrived at 345pm to the labor and delivery ward and at 745pm he was in his scrubs and ready to go! Watching him tear up as our daughter was born, seeing him cut her cord (through the mirror), and of course the moment he held her for the first time were all so special and emotional. We both know immediately that our little girl was gonna have daddy wrapped around her little fingers and would always hold a special place in BOTH our hearts.
Since Kelia's birth he has been the best, most devoted and doting dad I could have ever asked for or imagined for my child. He helps at all hours when I need it. He makes sure we both have everything we need at all times and are both OK. Whether it's to to make a food or Starbucks run, take shifts to shower, help feed/burp/change her, sing to her or calm her down, or even the car rides we have had to take just to soothe her, he is always there for her and for me. And after all that and at the end of the day he loves to just hold her and snuggle her and kiss her and it makes my heart so happy. He even enjoys filing her nails and giving her baths time to time! We clearly won the jackpot when it comes to having him as our husband and daddy!
For those of you who are single parents and doing it alone, I applaud you and give you tons of kudos because I can't imagine doing it alone. I know you guys are stronger than anyone who has help can imagine and are doing amazing at however you are handling raising your child(ren). You have to be both parents and that is tough and time consuming and leaves you with no breaks to freedom. You deserve a big reward and your little people will grow up and one day thank you so much when they learn what you have done for them over the years. All children will and should grow up to appreciate their parents, but raising kids alone is a whole other ballgame. I strongly believe things happen and children are placed in our lives for a reason and no matter the circumstances God knew you needed your child(ren) and knew you could handle what comes along with parenting and raising them to be awesome people.
I know personally God had me wait until I was 34 to be a mom because I needed my husband for the whole process and for the support and guidance he offers as well as the love and devotion he shows us that I always need.
I am so beyond grateful for God for the plan he has for my life and how it has been unfolding and of course I am so so blessed to be sharing life and these experiences with Cory.
- With Love,
Alana