Just like most couples, when my husband and I began trying to have a baby we figured it would be easy and we would be pregnant fairly quickly. However, we soon realized that wouldn't be the case. It took us over 2 years to conceive our daughter and not before we both were given an infertility diagnosis. This experience and knowing how common it is to suffer from infertility brings me to write this post.
In this post I will share a little bit about our story, some pictures and graphics with infertility facts, and end with some quotes to help anyone going through it.
*Please note all graphics/photos used in this post are directly from a Google search/miscellaneous medical or professional websites and I do not have rights from any of them*
Our Infertility Story
When my husband and I first started dating we discussed our goals for the future and we both agreed that we wanted to one day have children of our own and raise a family. The journey to do this isn't over yet, but it has been a crazy ride so far just getting our first child.
Let me give you a little background on me. So, If you don't know me, I struggle with mental health problems and always have and they are worsened by hormones naturally in my body and artificial ones such as in birth control. I started showing some struggles at an early age and after several doctors during my childhood I was able to final get diagnosed and find the perfect mixtures of medications to reduce most my symptoms. I have an anxiety disorder, bipolar II, boubts of depression at times (in the last several years though I haven't had any), and some OCD tendencies. I was very little and skinny in my teens and I didn't get my first period until summer before my 17th birthday. Originally because of this and in fear of damaging my reproductive system, with the help of my parents, I tried hard to gain weight as well as began birth control to regulate my cycle. The first pills I tried made me cry, the depoprovera shot made me manic, and nuvaring just never stayed where it should have. I ended up on the mini pill which is less hormones for a few years with less side effects than the others, but I did still have a few. PMS was awful, I was super emotional, migraines came on like clockwork before and after each period and I was basically bedridden the first 24 hours of my period each month.
Our story goes like this....
After I had dating Cory for over a year, we came to the conclusion that the birth control wasn't helping me at all, more so causing more harm than good; it made me cry easier, moody, and my cycle was off a lot of the time. We discussed me getting the copper IUD because it has no hormones and has seemingly good reviews. We knew that we wanted kids though in less than the 10 years the IUD is good for and didn't want me to have to deal with the pain of insertion and removal in a short period of time. We ultimately decided that we would use natural family planning and pull-out method as back up. (FYI: I do not recommend pull-out for anyone especially as only form of birth control! It is risky and not proven to be effective, but it worked for us!) This "method of birth control" worked for us for over 5 years and after our wedding in April 2017 we actually began trying to conceive.
I tested for ovulation, tracked my cycle in a couple apps, tracked my symptoms and cervical fluid, and we tried different proven methods for trying to conceive. 6 months into trying we began working with my OBGYN (who I love and am so grateful for!) and he did a work up on both of us. He told us that tests showed some issues with both of us that could make it difficult, but to keep trying another 6 months and we would address it again. 6 months went by and we ran some repeats of some tests, and were surprised when we finally got a positive pregnancy test 2 days before my birthday October 7, 2018. Sadly on my birthday, October 9th, I began bleeding and when I saw the doctor they diagnosed it as a chemical pregnancy or missed miscarriage. We were devastated, but also had glimpse of hope that maybe just maybe we could conceive again. In early January 2019 after nothing had happened again, we made an appointment with a highly recommended local fertility clinic. We went to see them at the endow January and an ultrasound confirmed I was getting ready to ovulate. At the same appointment, they went over our history with us, we gave them our medical records, and they told us based on everything including how long we had been trying we would most need IVF (in-vitro fertilization) to get pregnant because we had a 1% chance of conceiving naturally. It was difficult to process and we decided to return to everyday life and thinking about how we would go about affording it. Luckily Cory's health insurance at the time covered one cycle, but it would still be expensive. Two weeks later, the night before, Cory was scheduled to have his gallbladder removed, I threw up my late lunch and work and was over come by extreme nausea due to smells in the break room. I figured it had to be all in my head, but four, yes four, pregnancy tests confirmed I was already pregnant! Today, this little miracle is a happy and healthy baby girl we named Kelia Linei.
The following graphics show the fertility issues that caused us trouble conceiving. I have a tilted uterus and was told its literally upside down at this point which obviously makes it super hard for the swimmers to get to the right place! We also had low morphology which basically means a majority of the swimmers weren't shaped right to be in proper condition to penetrate an egg.
It may have been a longer and trickier path to grow our family, but now that our daughter is here we couldn't imagine any other way. It was totally worth it all to have her in our lives. We just hope when the time comes to add another baby to the bunch it isn't quite as difficult.
Here is a few resources full of good information regarding infertility. It can be due to the woman, the man, or unexplained. (Slide to see all 3) ...In another post, I will go into a little more detail about some of the common diseases that can affect fertility or cause infertility.
Inspirational Quotes For Infertility Warriors
"Be gentle with yourself, you are doing the best you can."
"And sometimes, against all odds, against all logic, we still hope."
"You were given this life because you are strong enough to live it."
"The longer you wait for something, the more you will appreciate it when you get it. Because anything worth having is definitely worth waiting for."
"When the world says "give up", hope whispers try "one more time!"!"
Are you a infertility warrior or survivor? Did you learn anything from the post you didn't already know?
With Love,
Alana